Tuesday, November 11, 2008

FW: Send this back. You'll see why!

Rant:
I absolutely hate these kind of emails. Please note that I didn't edit the email in any way to enlarge the font or make it any more annoying than it already is. Just to look at this thing I needed to scoot my chair back about 10 feet so it didn't hurt my face.
 
Maybe the font size is relative to sincerity. The bigger the deeper.
Ugh.
 
I'd like to find the sentimental person who pens these literary treasures and shellac their computer keyboards with crazy glue. (If that doesn't work, maybe I could send them a bucket full of all the nausea they create.)
 
I know my friends love me, so why do they torture me with so much of this crap? I figure if they like me so much they'd spare me by deleting the email. *sigh* (...and rolling eyes)
 
By the way, these emails are called "Glurge" by Snopes.com. Probably because of the overwhelmingly queasy feeling they create in the nanosecond between opening and deleting these emails.
-Pam


From:  xxxxxxxxxxxxxx 
Sent: Monday, November 10, 2008 6:48 PM
To:  xxx; xxxxxxxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxx; xxxx; xxx; xxxxxxxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxx; xxxx; xxx; xxxxxxxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxx; xxxx; xxx; xxxxxxxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxx; xxxx; 
Subject: Fw: Send this back. You'll see why!

 
----- Original Message -----
From:  xxxxxxxxxx 
To: xxx; xxxxxxxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxx; xxxx;
Sent: Monday, November 10, 2008 2:35 PM
Subject: Send this back. You'll see why!



--- On Mon, 11/10/08,  xxxxxxxxxxxx  < xxxxxxxx > wrote:
From:  xxxxxxxxxxxxxx 
Subject: Fw: Fw: Send this back. You'll see why!
To: xxx; xxxxxxxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxxx; xxxxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxxxxx; xxxx; xxxxx; xxxxxx; xxxxx; xxxxx; xxxx;  
Date: Monday, November 10, 2008, 2:11 PM


 
xxxxxxxxxxx
xxxxxxxxx business name 
Off:  xxx-xxx-xxxx 
FAX:  xxx-xxx-xxxx 
 xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx 



 

 
 
 
 
 




     




 
 



 

 

 

 

 



     
   
    
 
         
Old Age, I decided, is a gift 
 
    I am now, probably for the first time in my life,  the person I have always wanted to be.  Oh, not my
  body!  I sometimes despair over  my body, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging  butt.  And often I am taken aback by that old person that  lives in my mirror (who looks like my mother!) , but I don't  agonize over those things for long. 
 
    I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful  life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter  belly.  As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself,  and less critical of myself. I've become my own  friend.   
 
    I don't chide myself
  for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed,  or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but  looks so avante garde on my patio.  I am entitled to a  treat, to be messy, to be extravagant.  
 
    I
   have  seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before  they understood the great freedom that comes with aging. 
 
    Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on  the computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon?
 
 
    
I will dance  with  myself to those  wonderful tunes of the 50 & 60's, and if I, at the same  time, wish to weep over a lost love .. . I will. 
 
    I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is  stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from  the jet set. 
 They, too, will get old. 
 
    I know I am sometimes forgetful.  But there  again, some of life is just as
   well forgotten. And I  eventually  remember the important things.   
 
    Sure, over the years my heart has been broken.   How can your heart not break when you lose a  loved
  one, or when a  child suffers, or even when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by  a car?  But broken hearts are what give us strength and  understanding and compassion.  A heart never broken is  pristine and   sterile and will never know the joy of being  imperfect.
 
    I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my  hair turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever  etched into deep grooves on my face.  So many have never  laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn  silver.    
 
    As you get
  older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about  what other  people  think.  I don't question  myself anymore.  I've even earned the right to be  wrong.  
 
    So, to answer your question, I  like being old.  It has set me free.
  I like  the person I have become.  I am not going to live  forever,   but  while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could  have been, or worrying about what will be.  And I shall  eat dessert every single day. (If I feel like it) 
 
   
    MAY OUR FRIENDSHIP NEVER COME APART ESPECIALLY WHEN  IT'S STRAIGHT FROM THE
  HEART!
  MAY YOU ALWAYS HAVE A RAINBOW OF SMILES ON YOUR FACE  AND IN
 YOUR HEART  FOREVER AND EVER! 
 
         
  FRIENDS FOREVER!
 
    Forward this to
   at  least 7 people and see what happens on your screen . You will  laugh your head off!!!!!!!  
 
   
   
   
   

  

 

 

                                                                                                                             

 

 

 

 


 
http://www.incredimail.com/index.asp?id=109094




before you send hate mail

If something in this blog offends you, please accept my apologies, then keep it to yourself. I take great pride in my ability to laugh at myself and the world around me. My mission on earth, this lifetime, is to point out all of these funnies to you.

If you think this blog is funny, congratulations and thank you. My job here is done.

If, after reading this, you are still offended by anything in this blog, take two jokes by Carlos Mencia and see me in the morning.

thanks

Thank you to all the authors, photographers, email passers-on, and clueless rednecks who unknowingly contributed to this collection of emails and photos.

If you authored or photographed anything in this collection, or appeared in any photos shared here, please let us know and we will gladly give you full credit for your work. If you would like us to remove your work/photo(s) please let us know, and they will be forever removed from this site as soon as we receive your request. Either way, please allow us a few days to make changes, as we access this site only a few times a week.

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