Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Jesus' Dad's Name

Jesus' Dad's Name

A Sunday school teacher asked her class, "What was Jesus' mother's
name?"
One child answered, "Mary."
The teacher then asked, "Who knows what Jesus' father's name was?"
A little kid said, "Verge."
Confused, the teacher asked, "Where did you get that?"
The kid said, "Well, you know, they are always talking about Verge n'
Mary.''

***********
KIDS IN CHURCH

3-year-old Reese:
"Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name. Amen."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord's
Prayer for several evenings at bedtime. She would repeat after me the
lines from the prayer.
Finally, she decided to go solo. I listened with pride as she carefully
enunciated each word, right up to the end of the prayer: "Lead us not
into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us from E-mail.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One particular four-year-old prayed, "And forgive us our trash baskets
as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to
church service,
"And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One bright little girl
replied, "Because people are sleeping."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother, Joel, were sitting
together in church. Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud.
Finally, his big sister had had enough. "You're not supposed to talk out
loud in church."
"Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked.
Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men
standing by the door? They're hushers."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin 5, and Ryan 3.
The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake.
Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson.
"If Jesus were sitting here, He would say,
'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.'
Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A father was at the beach with his children when the four-year-old son
ran up to him,
grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore where a seagull lay dead in
the sand.
"Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked.
"He died and went to Heaven," the Dad replied.
The boy thought a moment and then said, "Did God throw him back down?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their
six-year-old daughter and said, "Would you like to say the blessing?"
"I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied.
"Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered.
The daughter bowed her head and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite
all these people to dinner?"

And if you don't send this to at least 8 people --- who cares?
Peace,love and happiness

before you send hate mail

If something in this blog offends you, please accept my apologies, then keep it to yourself. I take great pride in my ability to laugh at myself and the world around me. My mission on earth, this lifetime, is to point out all of these funnies to you.

If you think this blog is funny, congratulations and thank you. My job here is done.

If, after reading this, you are still offended by anything in this blog, take two jokes by Carlos Mencia and see me in the morning.

thanks

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