Monday, July 14, 2008

HOW TO INSTALL A HOME SECURITY SYSTEM WHEN ON A BUDGET :

1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's used size 14-16
work boots
2. Place them on your front porch, along with several empty beer cans, a
copy of Guns & Ammo magazine and several NRA magazines.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine.
4. Leave a note on your door that reads:

'Hey Bubba, Big Jim, Duke and Slim, I went to the gun shop for more
ammunition. Back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls -- they
attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't
think Killer took part in it but it was hard to tell from all the blood.
PS - I locked all four of 'em in the house. Better wait outside.'


INSTALLATION COMPLETE!!!!

before you send hate mail

If something in this blog offends you, please accept my apologies, then keep it to yourself. I take great pride in my ability to laugh at myself and the world around me. My mission on earth, this lifetime, is to point out all of these funnies to you.

If you think this blog is funny, congratulations and thank you. My job here is done.

If, after reading this, you are still offended by anything in this blog, take two jokes by Carlos Mencia and see me in the morning.

thanks

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