Tuesday, July 22, 2008

FW: Hollywood Muppets

Wow. This is so scary it's hillarious.
-Pam



 



 

 

Big Bird and Queen Elizabeth II -- Both owe their stature to genetics.

 

Grandpa Grouch and Don Imus: One's a grouchy, nappy-headed hand puppet, the other's a grouchy, nappy-headed hack pundit.

 

Ernie & Bert and Jimmy Kimmel & Adam Carolla -- Let's hope Jimmy and Adam never shared a bedroom.

 

Captain Breakfast and Brody Jenner -- One champions breakfast, the other lives off his dad's Wheaties sponsorship.

 

The Amazing Mumford and Billy Zane -- Wave your magic wand, say "A la peanut butter sandwiches," and try to make Billy Zane's hair reappear.

 

Benny Rabbit and Martin Scorsese -- Both in serious need of an eyebrow tweeze.

 

Sherlock Hemlock and Jeff Foxworthy -- If you host a show featuring children who are smarter than you, you just might be an obscure muppet. Tragically, you're just Jeff Foxworthy.

 

Guy Smiley and Ben Affleck -- Few celebrity craniums can compete with the size of Guy Smiley's. Ben's Beantown-bred bean is one of them.

 

Forgetful Jones and Alan Jackson -- "Where Were You (When the World Stopped Turning?)" won single of the year for Jackson . Forgetful can't remember where he was yesterday.

 

Janice and Donatella Versace -- So lifelike.

 

The Swedish Chef and Dr. Phil -- Does anyone really understand his semi-comprehensible gibberish?

 

Miss Piggy and Tori Spelling -- She brings home the bacon.

 

Sam the Eagle and Brad Garrett -- Everybody loves a unibrow.

 

Pepe the King Prawn and Steve Buscemi -- He's got Marty Feldman eyes.

 

Harvey Kneeslapper and Nick Nolte -- One's known for using joy buzzers, the other's been known to enjoy a buzz.

 

Elmo and actor Paul Dano -- There Will Be No-pun-good-enough-to-keep-this-caption-from-getting-negative-comments-from-Elmo-lovers.

 

Beaker and Carrot Top -- It's groundbreaking to have the world's first transgendered puppet.

 

Gorg and Bruce Vilanch -- Sally Jessy Raphael is that you?

 

 Crazy Harry and Chris Robinson -- that's scary.

 


before you send hate mail

If something in this blog offends you, please accept my apologies, then keep it to yourself. I take great pride in my ability to laugh at myself and the world around me. My mission on earth, this lifetime, is to point out all of these funnies to you.

If you think this blog is funny, congratulations and thank you. My job here is done.

If, after reading this, you are still offended by anything in this blog, take two jokes by Carlos Mencia and see me in the morning.

thanks

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