Saturday, November 24, 2007

Political Correctness

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America,
Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred
to as "HILLBILLIES."

You must now refer to them as
APPALACHIAN-AMERICANS.

And furthermore
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1 She is not a "BABE" or a "CHICK" - She is a
"BREASTED AMERICAN."

2. She is not "EASY" - She is
"HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE."

3. She is not a "DUMB BLONDE" - She is a
"LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY."

4. She has not "BEEN AROUND" - She is a
"PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION."

5 She does not "NAG" you - She becomes
"VERBALLY REPETITIVE."

6. She is not a "TWO-BIT HOOKER" - She is a
"LOW COST PROVIDER."

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

1. He does not have a "BEER GUT" - He has developed a
"LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY."

2. He is not a "BAD DANCER" - He is
"OVERLY CAUCASIAN."

3. He does not "GET LOST ALL THE TIME" - He
"INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS."

4. He is not "BALDING" - He is in
"FOLLICLE REGRESSION."

5. He does not act like a "TOTAL ASS" - He develops a case of
"RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION."

6. It's not his "CRACK" you see hanging out of his pants - It's
"REAR CLEAVAGE."

before you send hate mail

If something in this blog offends you, please accept my apologies, then keep it to yourself. I take great pride in my ability to laugh at myself and the world around me. My mission on earth, this lifetime, is to point out all of these funnies to you.

If you think this blog is funny, congratulations and thank you. My job here is done.

If, after reading this, you are still offended by anything in this blog, take two jokes by Carlos Mencia and see me in the morning.

thanks

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